There are days that I am a walking collection of trauma scripts. Each of them at the ready to be triggered and to be performed.
There are days that I am more balanced and able to respond to the needs of the moment and do so with more congruence.
I believe that at some point I will have shed most of those scripts. I also believe that that would be just before the moment that I pass away.
Until then: The best I can do is notice where I acted automatically. And try to act differently next time.